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I guess you should give people the possibility to take measures. (Though our government is taking them away right now). I still think people should be able to make their own choices about it. But then it's still better to be responsible about it.

It's impossible to restrict people of having a certain number of children (things like the Chinese one child policy are in certain ways not very humain, because you let them no choice), but it would be good if people paid attention to the number of children they have an for what reason they want children.

For example in some villages in the Netherlands some families have 10-15 children (raising the average a bit ), because for each child they got extra money from the government, and not all of that money goed to the care for the child, but to the parents. If you want more children for reasons like that, it could be good to have some sort of regulation for that.
As far as I know, now they reduced the money you can get from the government after you have more than 3 children.

@Nike.. yeah they are cutting down on the fees. But somehow that's good too. If you just get children for the money it's just stupid. Children grow up and they will cost you more than they'll bring in eventually.

Totally agreed on the statement above. So hopefully more people nowadays think that way and get their money in normal ways in stead of 'investing' in children.

But as the government wants the anticonception pill to be paid for from now on and ot via the health insurance... they're actually countering the effect, because in some cases it could lead to higher birth rates. It's also typical that of course women are against this new rule, while men, that actually have nothing to say about this topic, are totally pro. Which is just plain typical. In this case they should just leave it to the women

yeah I think so too.. and then they say: yeah.. but using a condom feels like we're cutting down on something which is our own. Ehhmm.. guys? What do women have to do?

@Nike: well.. my pill wasn't even in the basic insurance anyway.. it'll only cost me more the next year or so :O

Haha... yeah sorry for the direct statement Silvio. But that's just how some people here think about children, as Nike already pointed out rightly. If you only 'have' children for the money they bring in temporarily.. I wonder if that's good for the children. You should love them, not use them as a kind of fund for you to stay home, drink beer and watch TV all day long.

That's indeed the point. As far as I've heard from families with a bizarre amount of children, after a certain number of children the parents don't give the direct care anymore to their children, but leave the oldest children to it (who are by the time around 15-20 or even around their 30th year), so you get a bit of a disrupted parent-child relationship.

The clue of this lesson: Don't take more children than you actually can care for and never start having children when it's for the (temporarily) extra money you get.

*applauds*

with the rapid development of the econony in china ，the standard of living has been improved．china is the one of those who are able to buy the most of the luxuries．but there are still someone who are experiencing hunger and have no place to live in. so what i wanna say is that the gap between the poor and rich has increased rapidly in china, espeaially between the cities and villages.

and gaps between the rich and the poor will always be present everywhere. Just more clear in some countries than in others.

i wanna clear it that someone love children and wanna have one.but in view of some sakes,they cant get all they want.

first, when we chinese graduate from colleges or unniversity, we will face the competition and the increasing employment pressure.when women take an interview , interviewer will prefer the single ones without children, who are even requested to promise no marriage or no pregnanc in the several years before employed. to some extent, they prefer men than women for less troublesome. it's decided by china's national situation. in some way, it's kind of discrimination against women.

second, if babies were born , their parents need to spend much money on children from the baby care to the education. beside, what's worse, mum and papa wanna their babies will be educated well in the modern and advanced school ,where will cost much . though the Law stipulates that China implement nine-year compulsory education, all children above six, whatever sex, nationality and race they are of, should go to school to receive a nine-year compulsory education, the parents believe that private education encourages elitism, which made it worse the public school dunt have the advanced modern facilities with powerful teacher group.without the support of the government in the education, ppl couldnt afford the expenses of their children's education.

third, maybe money is not the big deal. did u hear the child slavery? it's a new name, used to describe the general life of their parents, who have work hard for their children ,made money for their children and lose their own life reflected the value of the states.they believe that women will not women again after bearing babies,who will be responsible for the children's basic necessities of life , education and healthy.then they will lose the value of self.in my opinion, these symptoms expose two terrible problems:

on one hand, for the only one child policy, parts of someone who were born after 1980s ,the only one child in the family, have some emotional defects.those ppl are lack of children's partnership and brotherhood since born, which is the important part of the indispensible emotion. proposing the slave of child theory is not for which couldnt afford the children, but for the lack of affection and emotional defects.

on the other hand, infertility culture invade and attack the birth culture. Earlier generations are universal marriage in general fertility.amost no one dunt wanna give birth. but nw the proportion of ppl dunt wanna increase fertility,which indicates the infertility's invasion of fertility culture. it's hard to make an transition from the birth cluture to non-reproducitivity. however once one accepts the non-birth culture, re-birth culture, will be more difficult.

anyway, in my view,birth, feeding children is a highly synergistic state, which will bring great happiness. in the face of a child , u cant distinguish the request and dedication. the well-being of nuturing the future generation, as the pride of parents, children and grandchildren around the kneel of satisfaction, the joy of a sense of family happiness, which can be measured using the cost?

so guys do u have some different ideas？ if do, plz tell me .looking forward to ur reply.

Quoted from "Silvio"

[...] the only one child in the family, those ppl are lack of children's partnership and brotherhood since born

From my experience I can say that that isn't true! I'm an only child and I can't say that I turned out badly... Talking about prejudices about only children.. heard them all! And as Silvio said.. if there are enough opportunities to meet other children and play it's ok. Besides that it depends on how the parents raise their children (my dad used to steal my toys and wouldn't give them back.. so then I had to fight with him over toys instead of with any other children). And of course my cousins were a good replacement too. I Guess it totally depends on how you cope with it as a parent (which is most important, because children feel that) and how you cope with it as being a child. Many of my friends don't have any brothers or sisters either.. Loads of opportunities in life to make friends.. that has nothing to do with if you are an only child or not... but how you live your life and if you go and look for other people. Just my point of view and personal experience.

Quoted

" if there are enough opportunities to meet other children and play it's ok. Besides that it depends on how the parents raise their children"

The term “China one” refers to the child who was born after the 1980s, when China launched the one-child policy. Not only are they the family’s only child, but they are also the family’s center of attention. Their parents and grandparents would spare no efforts in taking care of them, and would give them anything and everything, as if they were the “emperor” of the family.

As a result, most children of the “China one” generation lack independence as they have become so reliant on their families for support. Some parents even hired a maid for their children when they go to college. Other unfavorable characteristics include: bad communication skills, rudeness, ungratefulness and self-centeredness.

as far as i'm concerned, there are anything to blame in the parents and the only child themselves. to solve these consequences, we need to start from both sides.

as silvio and arianne said, parents should be responsible for teaching and taking care of child. first of all, parents shouldnt dote on their only child, otherwise, only children are sometimes spoilt.what's more important, my advice is that parents should give a more rational treatment to some children, making him not the center of the attention. in addtion, such "independence" shouldnt be allowed to continue through measures taken to prevent their child from the above character flaws. by encouraging their child to take part in the holiday activeties, they can train the children's social skill and play advantages of children.besides,it's essential to creat conditions in which children could get more contacts with guysand let him grow up in the collective. i believe both the child's physical and mental development will be healthy, so they are no longer called " the beat generation".

character varies with living conditions, it's impossibe to be one-sided capture the child's personality. so in my view, as only child, more importance should be attached to their psychological integrity and mental perfection to make their body and spirit as adults. besides, as growing up, the only ones need to correct and improve themselves after defects of characters found.

tha's my immature opinion. i'm looking forward to ur reply.

well... to add to what you just said wit... I don't think people (only child or not.. ) should even try to be perfect. It only leads to frustration when you can't be as perfect as you would like to be. Striving to be good at things and do things as well as possible is ok.. but pure perfection is rather impossible. (as my psychotherapist taught me.. )

yeah, i totally agree with u arianne , no one is perfect. even in greek myth, Achilles' heel can speaks for itself.
what we need to do is accept ourself both merits and dismerits. so why not enjoy life ?